One Day at a Time -- Progressively

I just looked back, expecting the last who-knows-what number of posts to reflect a struggle. I didn't find it -- primarily, I assume, because when I'm posting it's from a position of relative strength. The absence of many recent posts, then, reflects the struggle in its silence. And this post says there's strength again. It's not mine. I'm powerless over food and my life is hopelessly unmanageable -- by me. Fortunately, I can resign control and sit back and watch while the master pilot straightens the course. 

Yesterday's abstinence from food and games tore at the core. Today's has been relatively smooth. I sit here now in front of the television, wanting to play a game while watching the show, but I also know that relatively harmless behavior is just as harmless as it would be to go into the kitchen and bake cookies with the intent of eating just one. I cannot do just one -- game, cookie, box of pudding, whatever. If I were to open a game at a safe time, within three days (and probably tomorrow) it would be the dominant activity. So. No games. Not today. And my will staying in it's proper spot, not tomorrow or the next days. I actually can survive without ever again playing sudoku or spider sol or tetris or yubotu.... 

I met a 97-year-old man today who desperately wanted to go home, to "escape" the nursing home. He fully intended to continue to mow his lawn using a walker, but he was willing to hire somebody to do the edging. I made it possible for him to go home, though I limited what he could do there. But I hope at that age I'm not ready to give my life away to useless pastimes, either. He and I both have just the one day. May each of us live life fully and completely this day!