When is a decision more than that?

Consider Mark 10:17-21.

Are you a good citizen? When did you last commit a felony? A misdemeanor? An act of moral turpitude? If you did one out of character act in your youth you may still be wracked with guilt over it. A serious act of misconduct would probably result in terminal remorse. So. You’re a good Christian, right?

The answer is yes! You’re a good person, a person who believes in Christ, a good Christian. Right? Right!

Do you feel like it? Probably not. Even if you don’t murder, refrain from adultery, avoid taking anybody else’s stuff, even to the extent of taking back what you accidentally carry off—if you like the rich young ruler have dutifully obeyed the commandments since your youth, you know something’s lacking. “What must I do?” is your earnest prayer.

Don’t assume because of Jesus’ answer voluntary poverty is the answer. Don’t assume the rich cannot find the presence of the Kingdom of God. Look deeper at what’s happening. Jesus knew the man standing before him, knew his Achilles heel. The man’s wealth was more important to him than the peace and joy he sought. He was willing to follow Jesus but on his own terms, not of Jesus’. He couldn’t relinquish all. He could only relinquish most.

Don’t ask God to be your assistant. Don’t seek God as an equal partner. Don’t buy into the “God is my co-pilot” crowd. Make yourself God’s assistant, his employee, his co-pilot.

If you had the conversation with God, asking him what you had to do to find this peace of heart that can take the place of food in your life, what answer would you fear most? What would make you tremble if God suggested it had to go? Your reputation? Your intelligence? Educational status? Financial security? What would you not be willing to give up to be slim?