The obsession with stupid computer games is manageable. That doesn't mean it's not there. This is day four. By the end of this day, I'll have gone through Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday without playing stupid computer games.
So why just now did I have what seemed to be an overpowering urge to open a game? Fear. Procrastination is chronic low-intensity fear. I heard it and my heart knew the truth of it completely, automatically. What am I afraid of? Moving forward. This office is a shambles. It embarrasses me when I look around. I've been here well over 19 years now, and it's well inhabited. The offices of my counterparts around here are pristine in comparison--many of them actually pristine without even comparing them. I've got a credenza to my right with 30 or 40 books piled on top because they don't fit underneath. Above them are letters, papers, stuff, including a file box full of stuff for a book I've been planning to write at least 12 years. On the floor near the door is a scanner I bought on EBay and have never used, a cell phone holder, a coaster, a book I finished long ago, and some kind of a cord. To my left are boxes from my parents' house I have to go through as the family historian, to sell those things nobody wants to keep or to give to charitable institutions. Pictures I've intended to hang...
Funny! I was looking around, saw the pictures from last year's photo show, art I'd been intended to hang in my office I was going to say about a year. Then I realized as I was typing it had been exactly a year, that the deadline to take down the 2007 display of photos was 1:30 today. I got it done in the nick of time. Now I have this year's art to hang near my office as well. Anyway, you get the picture. I've got plenty I could go, merely in decluttering and you've got an inklink how much I procrastinate on writing projects, etc., as well.
The blog has served it's purpose for this entry. With plenty of other stuff I knew I could do, I needed to address the fear, and the blog worked for that. Thanks for being of serve.
How may I serve you?
The Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous
The Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous
1. We admitted we were powerless over food — that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to compulsive overeaters and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Permission to use the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous for adaptation granted to Overeaters Anonymous by AA World Services, Inc.
Although Overeaters Anonymous is a spiritual program, it is not a religious program, and use of OA material in the present connection does not imply OA’s affiliation with or endorsement of any sect, denomination or specific religious belief.
I am the author of Slender Steps to Sanity - Twelve-Step Notes of Hope. You may order a copy at Amazon.com (print or Kindle) or BN.com or the publisher's website.
Give a copy as service.
1. We admitted we were powerless over food — that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to compulsive overeaters and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Permission to use the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous for adaptation granted to Overeaters Anonymous by AA World Services, Inc.
Although Overeaters Anonymous is a spiritual program, it is not a religious program, and use of OA material in the present connection does not imply OA’s affiliation with or endorsement of any sect, denomination or specific religious belief.
I am the author of Slender Steps to Sanity - Twelve-Step Notes of Hope. You may order a copy at Amazon.com (print or Kindle) or BN.com or the publisher's website.Give a copy as service.
I am an author of A Cloud of Witnesses – Two Big Books and Us by Barbara B. Rollins with OAStepper. You may order a copy at Amazon.com (print) or BN.com or the publisher's website. Kindle and Nook versions coming soon.
1 comment:
HOW IT SUCKS
Rarely have we seen a person fail who followed us home. Those who are not BRAINWASHED are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this garbage, usually men and women who are constitutionally capable of thinking for themselves. There are such fortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born premature. They are naturally capable of building and developing muscles, which demands rigorous training. Their chances are 6/4 on.
There are those, too, who are gravediggers and undertakers, but many of them do become ZOMBIES if they have the capacity to be dishonest.
Our stories disclose in a twisted way, who we like, what happened, and who we hate now. If you have decided you want a cup of tea and are willing to go to any lengths to become emotionally shutdown, SHIFT SHAPING REPTILES - then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked, we thought we could find someone to 13th Step. And we realised, we could. With all the madness at our command, we beg of you to become Bill Wilson Clones - from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our BIG BOOKS and the result was nil until we let go of our SPONSORS. Remember that we deal with alcohol, frothy, bubbly, and powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is one who has all power that one is the BARMAN. May you find Him now!
Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the bar. We asked the BARMAN for a couple of stiff whiskies. Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program to INSANITY:
1.We admitted we were powerless over Coca - Cola, and decided to drink Pepsi, instead.
2.Came to believe that Cold Power was a detergent.
3.Made a decision to turn our heads when we saw an attractive blonde.
4.Did a body search of the new members.
5.Admitted to our DOG, to elves, and to another super being the exact nature of our songs.
6.Were entirely ready to have SUPERMAN remove the effects of kryptonite.
7.Humbly asked CLARK KENT to remove our brains.
8.Made a list of all persons who owed us money, and became willing to charge them interest.
9.Made direct hits wherever possible, except when someone moved the target.
10.Continued to talk crap and when we were wrong, promptly talked more crap.
11.Sought through our mail and computer to improve our conscious contact with BATMAN, as we understood him, praying only for knowledge of ROBIN and the return of SPIDERMAN.
12.Having had a stroke as the result of these steps, we tried to carry out the garbage, and fell flat on our backs.
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain their homes and 13th Step the newcomers, at the same time. We are not psychopaths. The point is, that we are willing to become psychotic. The principles we have set down are guides to psychosis. We claim that Bill Wilson was a psychopath.
Our description of the landscape, the chapter to the Gnostic, and our family photos before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were ugly and could not manage our own appearance.
(b) That probably no photographer could have improved our looks.
(c) That a PLASTIC SURGEON could and would if he were sought.
Peace Be With You
Micky
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